To the 20-something Divorcee

To the 20-something Divorcee,


This wasn't a part of your plan. I don't think divorce ever is. You wouldn't have imagined on that beautiful day, surrounded by your families and friends, that you would be here...only  a few years later.Or maybe you did think about it. Maybe somehow while you crafted your joyous reality, the fear seeped in through the crevices of your consciousness. But you did what you knew how to do: you kept moving forward in faith. To the 20-something divorcee, I want you to know that you are fiercely loved by your Maker. His love for you has not been tainted. His love for you has not diminished. His plan for your life still prevails.

As you walk this new path, give yourself permission to grieve. Allow yourself time to mourn the loss--- the loss of the future you thought would be, and the relationships that will never look the same. Take time process the big moments like when you take off that golden ring(wondering if everyone will notice); or when you attend functions and have to explain 'it' all over again. In the same sense, give yourself the space to mourn during the small moments too: when the Spotify  starts playing your wedding song, or when you smell 'that' fragrance walking through the mall.

Lean in to the life-givers around you. May you find in them an extension of the grace and comfort given to you by Jesus. They may not always know what to say, or how to respond, but may their presence and compassion be enough. As your friends step into marriage,motherhood, entrepreneurial success, graduate school, world traveling, physical and mental wellness- celebrate them. And when you go home after the celebration, and you finish double-tapping for the night, don't let comparison force you to exchange your joy for despair.

On the days when the clouds dont seem as dark, and an unexpected smile crosses your face, don't suppress it. It's okay to be sorrowful, yet rejoicing. It's  okay to hope for beauty in your tomorrows.


Above all else. Cling to your Maker.
Bring him your questions and your tears,
Bring Him your praises, and your fears.
Bring Him the messy and the broken.
Bring Him the words you've left unspoken.
Bring Him your hope for the future and all it may entail.
His plan for your life still does, and always will prevail.

To the 20-something divorcee, I want you to know that you are fiercely loved by your Maker. You are not alone. You are not forgotten. You are not cast-away. God is present in the valley with you. Though you may not see it, feel it, or believe it now: there is hope on the horizon.


Love you dearly,
D